Is flirting an art? A pleasure? A dangerous entertainment? A quality to master, or a fine line within which it is advisable to maintain in order not to be inappropriate.?
Is flirting an art , a gift of nature or a tool that can be inappropriate?
Let’s face it: it can be all of these things, and even a little more. However, it’s also an interesting and engaging way to get attention and break the ice with someone you feel attracted to.
Someone flirts almost without realizing it. Other people are so awkward when they flirt that it’s almost funny. Flirting is difficult and at the same time a quality that distinguishes certain people, to which it comes almost completely naturally. When silence is heavy and the desire to get noticed is felt, the time has come to learn the sublime discipline of teasing.
The meaning of flirting
The word flirt comes from English and has uncertain origins. Usually, it is used to describe a physical or romantic relationship in the early stages, or one that is otherwise uncommitted . When we say “ I had a summer fling ”, we usually imagine a short-lived relationship, more physical than sentimental, in which two people spent quality time together, without making plans . Flirting in the sense of relationship is based solely on the dimension of the present.
The voice of the verb flirt, on the other hand, refers to that practice of allusions , verbal or bodily, which refers to a potential relational interest. When flirting is playing and joking, courting each other, sometimes with intent, other times with the cards down. Basically, you don’t have to declare your intention to let people know you’re flirting. When the interest is mutual, a certain alchemy is immediately felt .
Flirting allows you to make it clear to those in front of you that you are interested . Interested in what? Getting to know each other, dating or maybe just deepening the conversation. In short: flirting is not a definitive and conclusive act, but a small flame of interest that lights up when you want to proceed with a certain approach.
The Rules of flirting
The first rule of the flirt club is that there are no rules. Fortunately every human being is different and every person is attracted to different qualities, words and attitudes. It is true though that each individual’s approach to flirting tends to be very specific , and as a result appeal only to certain personality types.
Flirting should come naturally . Lightness is the quintessence of flirting: when there is understanding, the flirting should arise completely spontaneously and reciprocally. Jokes, allusions, forms of non-verbal communication make up a part of the flirting whole, and allow you to understand right from the start if we are dealing with an interested person or not.
We said that in the flirt club there are no rules. That’s not really true. There are two that are dictated by common sense and social coexistence:
Don’t overdo it
Too much sucks, and a fundamental aspect of flirting concerns being desired and somehow waited for. While this isn’t part of established relationships, being desired is important in the early stages of getting to know each other.
Don’t go beyond certain limits
Flirting is such when there is a mutual interest, and unfortunately it is not always easy to understand if there is an interested person on the other side. Respecting physical boundaries and spaces is vital in order not to turn flirting into an oppressive or even toxic experience.
Within these limits everything is allowed, or almost.
Tips for better flirting
The Internet has spilled rivers of digital ink on the most correct flirting techniques. We have chosen a few that, in our opinion, can be applied to any situation.
Don’t maintain eye contact for too long
As fundamental as the gaze is, staring insistently at a person can produce the opposite effect to that hoped for. Periodically looking away from the source of interest is just as important as letting the person know, with his eyes, that he is interested.
Touch each other
Doing it even just by “mistake” can trigger a major flirt. Mentioning physical contact allows you to immediately understand if there is feeling, and if the situation is mutual. Very often it is subtle allusions that tickle someone’s imagination or desire, just enough to tease.
The smile
In general laughter is the precious weapon. Laughing and making people laugh play roles of fundamental importance in the complicity of flirting. When there is a desire to joke there is understanding, and there may also be the first seed of seduction.
Of course, any of this advice should be specific to the situation. When meeting a person for the first time , it is always important to respect their physical space.